how i managed my father's siblings

abah, or better known as boss (i call my father boss) has freaks as family.

maklong is the sensitive one,
dol/pak besar is the one i hate the most,
mak it is quite neutral,
odin /angah is cynical and i always try to match up to his capability,
bok is also irritating at times,
mama apa can be gruesome on bad days,
and then theres my dear boss,
acik raman passed away when he was very small due to high fever,
acik mizi is fairly nice,
mak bit sells nasi lemak and always choose not to receive our money,
mak encek is a very nice lady with a sense of humor,
acik bai is hard-headed u.mno supporter,
makzu is born unde-privileged,
makti used-to-be-my-father's-favorite-younger-sister is now a millionaire,
and last but not least, pakmi who has an affair with my cousin from my mother's side and caused his whole family; wife and kids, to be separated from him. sometimes i give him the i-told-you-so -look though i have never said anything to him, but i'm pretty sure someone else did.

the girls are normally the easier ones to live with, at least for more than a day. but the boys are tough. i would not want to be left alone with them for even 10 minutes. they can effortlessly say mean thing that makes me feel like strangling them.

one example;

"tadi dah plan nak tanya adik yang jual air ni macam mana die buat. tapi tengok muka die monyok aje, tak jadi la"

'orang makan gaji, ujan ke, panas ke, keje ke, tak ke, ujung bulan duit jatuh kat riba orang meniaga ni lain, kalao ari tak baik, sesen pun tak leh nak dapat. bukan senang nak dapat duit org.'

"(woi!!!, ape ko igt aku ni makan gaji buta ke??? president pun keje keras ok???)"

this is what i did to spare their lives;

"acik, acik dah ade makanan dah nak buka?"
'ade dah, kitorg bawak banyaaakkk'
"la...apesal tak cakap nak datang, leh rai beli kueh extra tadi. jom rai bawak pegi pasar ramadhan?"
'eh tak payah la, kuih pun kitorg ade bawak'
"mmm...ok"
'rai, mak dah balik?'
"ade kat rumah dah. acik nak pegi rumah ke?"
'itu la, tadi igtkan nak buka kat rumah ngan korang'
"la...kalao acik tau macam mana nak pegi rumah boleh la. macam mana rai nak bawak acik pegi rumah, rai pun buka kat sini"

(semua buat muka seposen)

hehehe. kelakar la korang ni. kelakar jugak dapat buli korang sikit. takde nye aku nak pegi meredah jalan raya kuala lumpur di kala hari hujan semata-mata nak membenarkan korang ade tempat selesa untuk berbuka puasa. tak kuasa. especially bila odin ade dalam group. tak tahan telinga aku nak menanggung.

so dengan paksa rela, mereka berbuka dengan kami kat hospital. wao wee~